The Beauty of Rejection

By: Isaac Mugisha

“Start where you are. Use what you have. Do what you can.” -Arthur Ashe

So many of you may not see any beauty in rejection; actually, all of us hate rejection. It’s hard to see the beauty of it. Yes, rejection hurts but only if you let it. That moment when you ask a guy or a girl what they’re doing this week, hoping and praying you get a reply back and all you get is a “kurya seené.” In Kinyarwanda, this means your text being left “unread” or ghosted as we say these days. Just imagining that embarrassing scenario gives you goosebumps right? Let’s be real.. rejection sucks! But I believe there is still beauty behind it. Behind all the fear, there is a pool of resiliency and courage that we never knew we had inside of us. Though we didn’t end up with the special girl, we gained lessons of courage that propel us to the next opportunity. That is where I find the beauty in rejection. This all comes down to knowing your self-worth!

Whether it’s a girl who is playing hard to get, your college application getting rejected, a guy not calling you back, not making the job interview you had, or you don’t make your high school ball team. These all are temporary rejections. For one to succeed in life, you must fail.. and fail hard a lot at times. Failure builds self-esteem; failure is the momentum to success. Sometimes one has to learn to fail even so many times that you feel like all you’ve ever been is rejected your whole life. The beauty within this pain is that the more you fail, the more you know.

I am not saying failure will lead to success, but what you do with that failure is what determines your success. What I’ve learned in life is that failing now can be the best thing that ever happens to you. I know this might sound crazy, but just hear me out. I have a friend I met a few months ago and I told her about a modeling agency that was coming to town, and she responded with, “Oh, yeah, I don’t do runways.” When I asked why, she simply said, “It’s not my thing.” I came to infer that it may be one of her fears of rejection. I say this to show that many of us find ways to smartly shy away from our fears and keep ourselves safe from rejection.

Never despise small beginnings!    

Never despise small beginnings! By not taking those risks now, you will not know what your chances are next time, because there is no next time; it will be your first time. Every time you fail just think about how much closer you are to succeeding. Now the questions you should ask yourself are Are you ready to fail? Is it worth the risk, or should I protect myself from being hurt.. from pain, from draining myself and putting in all the work just to be disappointed? You know opportunities come and go but making the right approach is the key to success, but first comes rejection.

Reality is, failure is the path to success, whether you like it or not. Ask yourself Have I failed enough, to prepare for the future? Up and down our lives go, but your perseverance in and through it all is the important lesson. Every time you fail, just think about how much closer you are to succeeding. Then, the beauty uncovers.

Do the work and then you’ll see the beauty….